Hi all. If you recall, we left it last time with a post on Navigating Social Media & Identity in the Next Generation. I had the opportunity this past Sunday to have a brief (or not so brief) conversation with my fellow Middle School leaders. After that talk, I’ve heard from several leaders (and parents) asking questions about how they can navigate this conversation in their context at home and in our small groups at Church. As I told Katherine, our Middle School pastor, my intention wasn’t to scare anyone. Rather, I wanted them to take the conversation seriously. If, as our teaching pastor Terrence said on Sunday, the data shows that 16% of the NextGen students have multiple alt-accounts and alt-identities in Social Media, that’s dozens and dozens of them just within our Youth Ministry alone. It’s important that we take this seriously!
To help with the “next right step” – I wanted to offer this followup devotional on the subject. As you recall, I focused on a couple of keywords last time – “pressure” and “anxiety” – because the NextGen students we serve are under tremendous pressure. They are always on 24/7. And as they navigate social situations – and social media technology – this can often lead to a lot of anxiety and real mental health challenges. I had planned on writing a follow up post on the Fruit of the Spirit – and after my niece Abbey read my draft post last time, she also mentioned the Fruit of the Spirit. We’ll call that confirmation. So, let’s do it!
Fruit of the Spirit
When I was a teenager 35 years ago, I went to summer camp one year where we sang a song about the Fruit of the Spirit. The main lyric went something like “The Fruit of the Spirit’s not a coconut” and then you tap your head twice. Then you repeat that. Then there’s another rhyme or two that leads into “…because the Fruits of the Spirit are…” and then you say them as fast as you can. “Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness and Self Control-ol-ol.” It’s a catchy little tune. After coconut are things like watermelon, or fig, or passion fruit with random arm movements. Our leaders made us laugh when they changed the lyrics to things like “Love, Joy, Pizza, Constipation, and Faithfulness, Gentleness and Pepto Bismol-ol-ol” – yes, I still laugh at that today. I found a YouTube version of this song here. Go listen and laugh with me.
I’m glad we have the Bible because the phrase “Fruit of the Spirit” comes straight from words of Paul in his letter to the Galatian Church. “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self‑control.” – Galatians 5:22-23.
The Fruit of the Spirit is not a to-do list; It’s the evidence of the work of Jesus, through the Holy Spirit, in your life. When “pressure” comes, and when “anxiety” hits, the Fruit of the Spirit become:
- anchors
- antidotes
- reminders of God’s presence and care
- practical tools for emotional regulation and self-care
So, in this context of “anxiety”, I’m proposing we take these Fruit – that is, the evidence of the Holy Spirit inside of us – and use them as a specific way to call on Jesus (through the Holy Spirit) to help us address these anxious feelings. In other words, use Scripture as a weapon against the enemy 🙂
Let’s break down a few of the Fruit below:
Love – the antidote to fear
Anxiety often grows where love feels absent:
- fear of rejection
- fear of failure
- fear of not being enough
But the Spirit grows a sense of God’s love that drives out fear. See also 1 John 4:18 and his perfect love!
Love creates safety — and safety calms anxiety.
Joy – not happiness, but strength
Joy is not the absence of anxiety; it’s the presence of God’s goodness.
Joy gives strength in the struggle.
It lifts the heart even when life is heavy.
A review of Romans 15:13 may be helpful acknowledging God is the source of your joy and peace.
Joy is a reminder: “My situation is hard, but God is here.”
Peace – the opposite of anxiety
This one is the most obvious connection.
The Spirit produces peace that doesn’t depend on circumstances.
It’s not self-manufactured calm; it’s God-given.
I love the words of Jesus in John 14:27 “My peace I give you you…Don’t let your heart be troubled”
Where anxiety says: “everything is out of control;” the Spirit speaks “God is with you. God is steady.”
Faithfulness – trusting God in uncertainty
Faithfulness grows endurance.
When things feel shaky, faithfulness reminds you:
- God has been faithful before
- He is faithful now
- He will be faithful again
This stabilizes anxiety by grounding your emotions in God’s character, not your circumstances.
I encourage a reading (or re-reading) of Lamentations 3:22-23. The mercies of God are new every morning, and as the hymn goes, “Great is your faithfulness!”
Gentleness – toward yourself
Anxiety often creates:
- self-criticism
- perfectionism
- internal pressure
But the Spirit produces gentleness — not just toward others, but toward yourself.
In my last post, I referenced Philippians 4:6-7 as it relates to anxiety. I’ll copy that here:
- Philippians 4:6-7 says “Don’t worry about anything, but in everything, through prayer and petition with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” – but that’s not all – “And the peace of God, which surpasses all undersanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.”
- This may be the most quoted Scripture about anxiety. Paul gives us a clear playbook we can follow 1) pray, 2) be thanksful, 3) trust God – and THEN – God responds with supernatural peace, not just emotional soothing.
But, don’t forget the verse just before it. Philippians 4:5 which says “Let your graciousness (gentleness) be known to everyone. The Lord is near!” This includes yourself. Be gentle with yourself silly human!
Students especially need to hear this:
- Gentleness means you don’t have to bully yourself emotionally.
- God isn’t harsh with you; so don’t be harsh with yourself.
Self Control – over thoughts and reactions
Self control doesn’t mean controlling emotions.
It means the Spirit helps you control your responses to those emotions.
Paul in Romans 13:14 calls this “putting on the Lord Jesus Christ” – call on his power to help!
This is huge for anxiety:
- instead of spiraling
- instead of catastrophizing
- instead of reacting out of fear
The Spirit helps you pause, breathe, and choose a different response.
Summary
Here’s the TLDR – When someone is anxious, the Fruit of the Spirit become:
- Love → drives out fear
- Joy → strengthens their heart
- Peace → calms the mind
- Faithfulness → anchors them in God
- Gentleness → softens the pressure
- Self-control → helps them respond wisely
The Fruit is evidence that the Holy Spirit is actively helping you through anxiety, not judging you for having it.
Now What?
Right. This is all well and good DW. Thanks for the Bible lesson. But now what? How should I use this and have a thoughtful conversation on the subject? I’m glad you asked. I’ll end this post and leave you with some thoughts that may help guide a conversation with your students in Small Group, or maybe your own children at home.
Is this perfect? No. Is this practical and maybe a useful “next right step” for you? Maybe. Try it!
- 5-Min Small Group (or Family) Check-in
- Check-in 1: ask “Where did you feel stress this week?”
- Check-in 2: ask “When you feel anxious, which happens more—your heart races, your thoughts spin, or your stomach hurts?”
- Read: Galatians 5:22-23; ask “Which fruit would help you most right now?”
- Grow: ask “how could you fertilize these Fruit in your life?” They may say, or you could offer, things like reading the Bible, prayer, meeting with leaders, talking with parents, journaling, etc.
- Real Talk: Self-Control – You can’t always control feelings, but you can choose how to respond.
- PBP – Pause → Breathe → Pray → Act with wisdom.
- Pray: (breathe in quietly: “Jesus, I trust You,” breathe out: “Give me Your peace.”)
- Commit: One small step this week.
- Closing Prayer: “Holy Spirit, grow Your fruit in us—peace, gentleness, and self-control—so we can trust You when we feel anxious. Amen.”
- Leader / Parent Tips
- Normalize + Name: “Anxiety is common. You’re not alone.”
- Regulate with them: Slow breathing, simple prayer, grounding (5 things you see/hear/feel).
- Language to use: “I’m with you.” “Let’s invite Jesus into this.”
- Language to avoid: Platitudes (“Just calm down”), minimizing (“It’s not a big deal”), or diagnosing.
- Safety: If anxiety seems persistent, severe, or includes self-harm talk, get additional help!